Sex Comment and Humour Blog. An entertaining slant on the amusing, lurid and sometimes ridiculous side of sex…

It seems that the Rude Man of Cerne, a gigantic ancient figure carved into a chalk hillside in England, is slowly fading into the background as grass and moss accumulate on his outline. 

Famous as a fertility figure, the giant sports a huge erection as well as a giant club.  Grazing sheep used to keep his outline clear, but as farmers no longer lend their sheep to the National Trust, the call has gone out for human volunteers to bring the giant back to his former glory.

Legend has it that any woman trying to get pregnant should spend the night alone on the head of the giant’s penis.  I bet some enterprising young man dreamed up that story, hundreds of years ago, as a way of ensuring a regular supply of nubile young women, appearing unaccompanied at night on his local hillside.

You can imagine him checking the giants penis every night for another impressionable young woman. 

“Hi, what are you doing here?” he asks her,

“It’s the legend” she replies “If I stay all night here, on the giants penis, I’ll be with child by the morning”

He sits down beside her, gazing into her eyes… “I’m the giants helper…”

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